The Bachelor‘s latest suitor, Zach Shallcross, certainly isn’t the first bachelor to make us eat our own words, but he’s the one in the spotlight right now — and we’re not the only ones rolling our eyes at his antics this season.
Starting so strong, we were singing Zach’s praises early on, sure he was the bachelor we needed — the one who would have a season built upon heartfelt bonds with the women, authentic conversations, and less drama than we’d seen in years. Clearly, we had our rose-colored glasses on. Now, hear us out, we’re not saying Zach is all bad by any means, but come on now, there are some situations he’s navigated so poorly, we’d just as soon take a risk with letting a toddler take the wheel.
Lest we forget the saying, not to throw stones when you live in glass houses, and we go into this with the full realization that what’s being shown on television is but a glimpse into the larger picture. Still, it’s just not a great glimpse, and the fantasy suites situation was the cherry on top of the ice cream sundae we just didn’t ask for — and we’re just the audience who watched those uncomfortable scenes at home. We weren’t the ones living it.
Obviously, Zach has us feeling all of the feelings this season, and that sentiment is shared by viewers everywhere. It’s evident that we’re all gearing up for what might actually be the most dramatic season finale of The Bachelor yet, and all eyes are on Zach.
To empathy or not to empathy — that is Zach’s question
One issue fans of The Bachelor have seen with Zach throughout his journey is a seemingly glaring lack of empathy. Now, before die-hard Zach fans crucify us, hear us out — we’re not saying that he’s a narcissist by any means or that he’s utterly void of empathetic feelings, but there have been several moments in which we’re watching the series through gaps between our fingers, covering our eyes in embarrassment.
Fans aren’t the only ones who noticed this behavior from Zach, as Bachelor Nation’s own Nick Viall spoke out about it, and while he doesn’t believe in labeling him a narcissist or writing him off completely, he does recognize that Zach isn’t giving it his all in some big moments.
One glaring issue Zach has faced this season is his lack of ability to share a compassionate moment when women are having a vulnerable moment or sharing an insecurity. While there have been moments in deeper conversation where Zach can pivot and learn from the conversations at hand, some moments stand out as unfortunately crafted, with Zach tensing up and feeling anger where an understanding might have served himself and his love interests better.
Fans replied to Viall in the comments section, and this one really sums up how many of us are feeling; it seems like he sort of shuts down when doubt or concerns are addressed, which causes the write-off of feelings as far as everyone involved is concerned. It makes it harder for bonds to form in challenging times because there’s no opportunity for a space to move forward without what appears (and might truly be) a lack of empathy.
Thinking of moments with Katherine Izzo and Greer Blizter stick out to us the most, and with just a moment of compassion vs. immediate shutting down, things may have been less intense for everyone involved. Of course, it’s easy to judge while we’re sitting at home, not baring our souls on a dating television series, but in giving Zach grace, we can also note that there were moments when he could have given more of that to the women.
Whose COVID was worse — and why was that even a question?
Of course, we have to talk about one of the most eye-opening moments in the series, and going into it with compassion isn’t something we’ll skip. Everyone knows that being sick automatically changes how we perceive what’s happening around us and can make anyone more prone to having less patience than we’d typically have. Being sick with COVID is something unnerving on its own, so a diagnosis while trying to navigate any part of life isn’t something we welcome.
Being diagnosed on a dating series when you’re trying to savor every second had to be a significant stressor for Zach, and taking that into account is something many fans did. If you’ve looked him up on social media platforms, you’ll see varying degrees of support and condemnation for some of the moments we’ve seen this season, but there’s a brighter light shone on this one. Yes, he was sick and not feeling like the greatest version of himself, but when comfort and a level of understanding were offered to him, he shut it down so quickly that we almost had whiplash.
When Greer was trying to relate to Zach and show him a sense of empathy, he reacted in such a way that turned off audiences in a big way. It almost became a conversation of whose COVID situation was more detrimental instead of a moment when, if he’d taken a second to examine the conversation, it might have caused minor annoyance at most.
What the moment did highlight was a big red flag for most viewers who thought his scolding Greer wasn’t just uncalled for but really quite nasty.
Yes, Greer was trying to relate to Zach in a seemingly unrelatable circumstance, but the idea wasn’t to downplay what he had going on; it was to provide a place where they could talk — a space for Zach to realize that he wasn’t alone. Greer’s “iPad” date had to be one of the most uncomfortable dates, not just within this season but within the Bachelor franchise as a whole. We’re hoping to see her in paradise on her way to finding a new love connection soon.
No-sex fantasy suites … sort of
The latest round of pushback against Zach comes from how he handled the season’s most significant dates, and don’t get us wrong, the sentiment behind his decision was sweet. He was having a hard time reasoning with the idea that he’d soon be getting engaged, and he and his fiancée would have to face the fact that he’d slept with other women so recently. See — we told you it was an admirable idea. The thing is, the road to hell is paved with good intentions, right?
Zach’s first fantasy suite date was with Ariel. After telling her about the no-sex rule, she was a little bit overcome with surprise but quickly told Zach that she understood, respecting his decision and allowing them to move forward towards intimacy differently. The two shared deeply personal conversations and woke up together with smiles on their faces and a longing in their eyes, but they hadn’t broken Zach’s rule.
We have to admit; we sort of anticipated that Ariel and Zach might be the ones to test the boundaries, as their physical chemistry has been skyrocketing for the entirety of the series, but they did share intimate moments in another important way. When Zach moved onto his second fantasy suite date, he shared his same rule with Gabi, letting her know that physical intimacy was off the table for the evening.
The following day looked comfortable between Zach and Gabi, both enjoying one another’s company, existing in a state of bliss, having shared a night together with no cameras and no mics, finally getting to have time together that wouldn’t be shared with anyone else — or that’s how it should have gone.
What ended up transpiring was a conversation between Zach and Gabi that audiences were made privy to, where Zach mishandled everything that happened between them. As we all know by now, the pair were intimate on a physical level, but that’s not where the problem truly lies. The fantasy suite dates are often seen as the “sex dates,” and everyone involved in the series knows the potential is there; it’s not often, however, that those dates are spoken about in the manner that they unfolded this season.
It wasn’t just that Zach wanted to tell Kaity; it’s that he had a separate televised conversation with Gabi about telling Kaity, where he almost seemed like he was second-guessing their decision and then moving back and forth between sharing a deep affection for Gabi and putting her in an uncomfortable situation at that moment and setting her up for one of the most uncomfortable rose ceremonies in Bachelor history.
Another awful part of the fantasy suite moment is that when Gabi asked Zach why he was there the following day when he should have been getting ready for his next date, he played it off as he’d really not care to miss it. It wasn’t a good look for Zach to brush off that he had another woman waiting for him. Understanding that he at least wanted to give Gabi a heads up is one thing, but if you watch that scene again, he acts very nonchalant about Katiy still being part of the scenario at all. We would hate to be her as she watches that portion of the series; he brushed her off entirely.
That not-so-stellar order of passing out roses
Of course, the continuing circumstances play into that rose ceremony after the fantasy suites.
One moment that made fans cringe was that of the second to the last rose ceremony after Zach had handled everything with Gabi, listened to her vulnerable conversation about always feeling like she was being picked second, and then giving her the rose — second. We couldn’t make it up if we tried, and after the moment they had together, and how raw she was in sharing emotion with Zach, social media was ablaze with comments on how absent-minded the entire situation felt on his behalf.
When it comes down to it, it was more than just the order of the roses he was handing out. Zach seemed to ignore Gabi completely after he gave both women their roses, making eye contact with Kaity and focusing his joy and excitement for the future entirely on her. Fans noticed that immediately and took to social media to talk about it; the order of roses handed out usually doesn’t mean much — unless you’re one of the contestants waiting for one, but to then not indulge in Gabi’s moment with her felt like an extra moment of frustration for her, and rightfully so.
If it had been a rose ceremony a little while after a conversation about feeling picked second, or even a rose ceremony without the weight of how far into this process they all are, it might not have felt like such a potent sting, but there’s not a lot fans could find to justify this one.
Bachelor Nation speaks out
Several members of Bachelor Nation have also shared their sentiments regarding where Zach is on his journey, and he’s receiving everything from an understanding nature to sheer shock and disappointment. From Joe Amabile and Serena Pitt to Nick Viall, those who know the series inside and out have a lot to say.
In a recent episode of the Click Bait Podcast, Serena and Joe said they feel for Gabi, recognizing how confusing everything in those moments must have felt for her. Pitt shared that the moment in which Zach told Gabi he was going to tell Kaity about their overnight and their decision to sleep together, he wasn’t just telling her; he was telling everyone watching the series.
“I’d be like, ‘Now you’re coming to me and exposing this to everyone watching, and all of my friends and family know that I slept with you and now you’re going to go tell another girl about it too, all while telling me how much you like me and that you’re falling for me.’ It’s all mixed into one and I was so overwhelmed by the conversation.”
Amabile was also overwhelmed, noting that when you sign up for a reality television show, you know everything you do could be shown on television, but there’s a difference between living with that fact and anticipating the type of conversation Zach and Gabi had.
“When you go on a reality show, you have to expect that everything you do has the potential to be shown. We don’t know the conversation they had in private. Maybe Zach said something about it to her in the Fantasy Suite about telling Kaity. But if Zach told her that it was just between the two of them and then went and told everyone that’s different. We do feel for Gabi because that must feel like sh*t.”
It’s entirely possible that they’d talked about the next steps during their fantasy suite night together, and he’d changed his mind in the moments after, but it almost feels like that conversation should have been private. Understandably, that takes away from what happens next, but as Kaity didn’t want to hear that Zach slept with Gabi, we didn’t like watching it all unfold either.
We’re no strangers to Bachelor Nation, and everyone knows what fantasy suites have the potential to become, but there’s also the understanding that conversations about what happened and with who are usually saved for a private moment with whoever needs them when the cameras aren’t rolling.
Wells Adams, Viall, and even some celebrities have shared their opinions on Zach’s actions throughout the series and on the big fantasy suites episodes, and there aren’t too many singing his praises for the handling of serious conversations and profound moments.
All in all, fans aren’t convinced that Zach is genuinely anyone’s prince charming with how his behavior has been throughout his journey on The Bachelor. That being said, we’re all aware that we see just glimpses into this larger picture, but it goes without saying that the glimpses still show us a piece of truth in the journey. This fan feels that Zach is the sort of guy to complain at very inopportune times.
No matter what happens next, some things can’t be erased, and some moments can’t be taken back; it’ll be interesting to hear what Zach has to say about the no-sex (sort of) fantasy suites, how he handled himself immediately after, and if he was genuinely at the mercy of poor camera editing or if he needs a lesson (or several) in empathy.