“Pride week and drag queens on college campuses; interesting concept,” while those ten words might not lay the groundwork for a particularly groundbreaking conversation, the young woman who spoke them at the beginning of a recent video certainly felt like they did.
A college student named Olivia took to TikTok in June of this year and shared her feelings about being in an elevator with drag queens on her college campus and how truly confusing the situation was for her:
“I recall going to class during pride week, and I got into the elevator of a really old building to go up to my class, and all of a sudden, three pride drag queens got in the elevator — they happened to be going to the same floor as me, and I remember feeling super uncomfortable and really confused. I was really confused because I was trying to go to a class that I paid for that was going to help me in my future, and then all of a sudden, I have sexuality being thrown in my face.”
We’ll stop right here before we go any further by saying that we know you’re totally getting ready to provide tissues and a shoulder to cry on for the young lady at the heart of this genuinely uncomfortable situation, but wait — another TikTok user came through with something more powerful; he presented the student with a situation of his own, then a reality check, and a life lesson.
Austin Archer (@yourpal_austin) might just be our new favorite person on social media, and it’s for many reasons. One, Archer went into a “bit” immediately as he showed Olivia how he had absolutely endured the same type of totally overwhelming situation during a recent trip to the grocery store, and two, he told her that today could be the day when she decides to do better.
“I know that you’re really going to want to lean into a victim complex here. I know that you’re going to want to lean into the idea that you’re being bullied somehow for your beliefs or for expressing an opinion, and I just want to be really, really clear with you that that’s not what’s happening. You went on the internet and showed yourself to be a bigot, and people came into your comments and said, You’re a big hit. And that’s all that happened. And I know that you’re a literal child and that you’re at most 20 years old, but that’s why we need to catch this, bottle it up, and use it as a teachable moment.”
The bit he went into sounded a lot like the comments section of Olivia’s TikTok, with people sharing harrowing tales of trying to exist in the world and — brace yourselves for this one — being met with…other…people, and not just other people, different people!
The shock. The horror.
All in all, the elevator situation (see also: elevator ride) should have been eye-opening for Olivia; as we assume she’s experienced things (see also: life) like this before. Much like spirit week at your middle or high school, kids who wanted to dress up and participate could, but you weren’t forced to. One could even bring up Halloween, a date within a calendar year in which we’re all aware that we’ll see trick-or-treaters prancing around our neighborhood streets — but no one is knocking on your door to enforce your participation.
Olivia might have been in an elevator with the drag queens, but she wasn’t then required to attend a pride week event. She simply rode an elevator in an old building to a particular floor with them, and as many comments on her video explained, we’ve all done that.
Students who attend college for an English major will likely ride an elevator with cheerleaders dressed up to head to a game. Those who go to college with an athletic scholarship will probably end up in an elevator with a studious counterpart who has never played a sport — and no one ever complains about it because it’s all just part of life.
That very notion is at the heart of Archer’s response, but it was what he did next that wowed us. Instead of meeting Olivia’s sentiments with disdain and malice, he told her that this was the perfect moment to unlearn behavior she was comfortable with and to challenge herself to choose differently next time:
“Okay, don’t do this. Don’t be this way. Don’t think this way. Whoever taught you to be this way, open up that part of your brain and just dump it out and knock it off right now because they gave you some bad info, and they taught you to be a bad person, and it’s not working for you, and it’s going to continue to not work for you as you get older.
Like today, the social consequence that you’re facing is getting ratioed and having old farts like me dunk on you on the internet — but tomorrow, the social consequences that you could face for being a bigot could be a lot heavier; you could lose your job, you could lose friends, or potentially have family members that no longer want to be around you.”
In watching the other videos on Olivia’s TikTok, one might assume that she’s not jumping at the chance to take the advice from Archer, but that’s okay — because in a world where we could all easily be unkind to one another, this stands as a reminder that a bit of kindness is worth the extra effort; in addition to a little sarcasm, of course.
Hey, how else are we going to make it through?