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The Worst Movies Of 2015 (So Far…)

Last week, us WGTC critics counted off some of our favorite films of 2015 so far, but all in all, it hasn't been a terrific first half of the year. Avengers: Age of Ultron arrived as a bloated, messy sequel with far less charm than the first MCU phase-capper, talented sci-fi filmmakers like the Wachowskis and Neill Blomkamp delivered some of their worst work to date in Jupiter Ascending and Chappie, Johnny Depp eliminates any residual good-will in Mortdecai, and strong actors like Tom Hardy and Jonah Hill ended up mired in slogfests Child 44 and True Story. It's been a depressing season for cinephiles punctuated by some occasional pleasant surprises.

Matt Donato: Hot Tub Time Machine 2

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Hot Tub Time Machine came as a surprise to everyone. Could a movie with such an asinine plot seriously work? With the help of punchy 80s comedy and some serious laughs, John Cusack and company scored a stellar comedic hit. But lighting striking twice on the same ridiculous concept? I can’t say I’m surprised by the sequel’s utter failure.

Hot Tub Time Machine 2 is basically one long-running dick joke, whether characters are saying the word, or someone is literally rubbing their junk up against a squeaky-clean window. The absence of Cusack means Rob Corddry takes over as the gang’s leader of sorts, but his guidance only translates into stupidly juvenile tenancies that fail far too often. Like I said, if you don’t giggle upon hearing the word “penis,” you’re in for a rough watch.

This is a sequel that takes all the funniest parts of the original, and rehashes them over, and over, and OVER again, until we’re begging for our own hot tub time machine. You know, so we can gain back the last hour-and-a-half of our lives.

SW: The Cobbler

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I’ll say this much: I left The Cobbler with a smile plastered on my face and certain it was a film I’d remember for years to come. This was owed entirely to the incredible, stupefying final ten minutes, which almost justify sitting through the 90 minutes of The Cobbler that are just a stupid, pernicious and wasteful Adam Sandler comedy.

The Cobbler’s New York fairy tale quickly devolves into an unintentional farce, and its star may not be pleased that the cavalcade of Sandler impressions that the film’s premise calls for turn a solid supporting cast into a parade of mugging caricatures. The next step in the promising career of writer-director Thomas McCarthy has unfortunately been right into a steaming pile of shtick.

Bless you then, The Cobbler, for choosing your own ridiculous, baffling and insane ending, instead of just a quiet one.