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Nato And Remy’s Last Stand: Which 2013 Horror Movies Have Us Giddy With Joy?

Before getting to this week's horror themed posting, Remy and I would just like give a hearty "Happy Holidays" to all our readers! Drink, party, be merry, and enjoy yourselves! Yes, it's that special time of the year where dreams come true, family comes first, yule logs blaze, dreidels spin, Kwanzaa candles are lit (right?) - holiday charm so strong even old Remy and I are lulled into a charitable sense of giving. Come with Remy and I as we list our ten most anticipated films which will (hopefully) dominate the 2013 horror movie game!

Nato – Hack/Slash (TBD, TBD)

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Director: (Currently) Marcus Nispel 

Alright, the sad truth is I know there’s a 99% chance I won’t see comic badass Cassie Hack brought to life on screen in 2013, but a horror nerd can dream, right?

Let me explain what Hack/Slash is about for all you unknowing baby birds out there. The ever so sultry Cassie Hack is essentially THE ultimate survivor girl, aka that stereotypical lone female in horror movies who always survives the ordeal, except Cassie doesn’t take fondly to the evil “slashers” who slay freely in the world and torment innocents like her, so she sets out as a traveling mercenary. Accompanied by her hulking “bodyguard” Vlad, Cassie goes town to town killing “slashers,” even tussling with famous horror faces like Victor Crowley, Chucky, and Herbert West from Re-Animator.

So yeah, basically it’s the mother-load for horror fans, taking the “survivor girl” stereotype, and morphing her far beyond a simple movie survivor. Don’t hold your breath on this project though, as numerous directors and studios have been tied to Hack/Slash over the past few years, but latest reports are stating director Marcus Nispel (The Texas Chainsaw Massacre/Conan The Barbarian) has the job if production can start sometime soon.

And please, please, pleaseeeee let it.

Remy – S-VHS (TBD, TBD)

Directors: Adam Wingard/Simon Barrett/Gareth Huw Evans/Timo Tjahjanto/Jason Eisener/Eduardo Sanchez/Gregg Hale

V/H/S was definitely one of my biggest surprises when it came to horror movies in 2012. I get horror wood when anthologies are well made, and that is just what V/H/S was. Though the main storyline was a bit disjointed, no horror fan can argue just how enjoyable that film was. You know the best part about movies like that thought? If there is a segment you are not enjoying, just wait, you’ll be at the next segment in a matter of minutes.

The real joy behind V/H/S is that producers gave the camera to some GREAT up and coming horror directors, and they just let them do their thing. The end result is some wildly varied stories, that somehow, all seem to work (except for that one about the weird, static serial killer in the woods) and S-VHS is looking to further that synergy. With directors like Eduardo Sanchez (who did The Blair Witch Project and Lovely Molly, which I absolutely loved) to Gareth Evans, who directed the action orgy The Raid, there is some REAL talent behind this title, and though we are unsure if S-VHS is dropping in 2013, we can safely say, whenever it does drop, we will be there.

Nato’s Special Addition! The Devil’s Carnival 2 Officially Announced!

Director: Darren Lynn Bousman

I woke up this Christmas morning to make my final edits and proofread my work, but low and behold I checked my Twitter and saw a Christmas present in the form of a teaser trailer for The Devil’s Carnival 2! Now I had heard Bousman was working on a follow up, but couldn’t find a lick of information on the internet anywhere before now, so our trailer provides the first concrete announcing of a Devil’s Carnival sequel.

Creative juggernaut Terrance Zdunich is obviously back to script another musical tale of horror, but aside from him, no casting has been revealed – except one hilarious and awesome addition unveiled in the above teaser. Looks like we’re going outside the rock and roll universe this time around ghouls and ghoulettes, and I can’t f#cking wait!

Hope you’re as excited about these flicks as we are! Also, feel free to let us know if we missed any 2013 horror movies you just can’t wait to feast your eyes on!

*A special thanks to Remy for stepping in to guest write! Feel free to follow either of us on Twitter for even more insanity and updates:

Matt Donato

Remy Carreiro

Like what you read? Check out last week’s article where we wrote an article involving Pokemon and fighting horror movie Santas? Still confused how that one was churned out…