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An entirely unnecessary fantasy sequel nobody asked for and even less people paid to see raises a streaming army

What, no threequel?

the huntsman winter's war
via Universal

It’s never a good sign when the studio behind a blockbuster that actually managed to do decent business at the box office actively hands over the rights for the sequel to a direct rival, which was the first of just many signs that The Huntsman: Winter’s War was on course to bomb hard.

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The first installment was hardly a classic, and existed in that strange time capsule where companies that weren’t Disney tried to muscle in on the live-action fairy tale fad, but it nonetheless conspired to bring in almost $400 million from theaters and seize tabloid attention after it was revealed married director Rupert Sanders was having an affair with Robert Pattinson’s then-partner Kristen Stewart.

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With the latter out of the picture, Chris Hemsworth was bumped up to top billing, and immediately continued enhancing his track record of wanton failure outside the confines of the Marvel Cinematic Universe, with Winter’s War earning $165 million from multiplexes to plunge Universal an estimated $75 million into the red when all was said and done.

In theory, a sweeping fantasy epic boasting Hemsworth, Charlize Theron, Emily Blunt, Jessica Chastain, Sam Claflin, and many more besides shouldn’t be the subject of unmitigated failure on every level, but the widely-panned and money-losing monstrosity that was The Huntsman proved otherwise.

And yet, because big budget and effects-heavy genre offerings loaded to the brim with star power are always lurking in the shadows of streaming waiting for a comeback, Winter’s War has raised an army of eager viewers and plunged back into the spotlight. Per FlixPatrol, the crushingly dull bore has been fighting against the forces of evil on Prime Video’s global watch-list, leaving us to feel sorry for anybody unaware of its reputation who may be expecting something semi-entertaining.