Home Movies

A walking, talking, sexually-charged cliche from a stone-cold action classic suffocates a second wind of adulation

They just don't make ridiculous characters like they used to.

xenia onatopp goldeneye
Image via Eon Productions

There are many factors that conspired to ensure Pierce Brosnan’s debut as James Bond in GoldenEye as one of the best action blockbusters of the 1990s; a list of accolades that ranges from the stunning set pieces to its roguish charm, via some scenery-chewing villainy and a twinkle in the eye of everyone involved on either side of the camera having so much damned fun.

Recommended Videos

One element that definitely can’t be overlooked under any circumstances, though, is Famke Janssen’s ludicrous femme fatale Xenia Onatopp. Even her name is ripped directly from 007’s playbook of punny conquests, and the fact she appears to derive sexual pleasure from her preferred method of literally crushing men between her thighs is utterly preposterous in both concept and execution.

goldeneye

Putting the far-fetched nature of it all to the side, a combination of Janssen’s knowing performance and GoldenEye‘s deft balance between attempting to ground itself in some semblance of reality while simultaneously utilizing every trick from the Bond back catalogue has ensured that Xenia endures as one of the greatest female adversaries – or allies – MI6’s finest has ever faced.

More than a quarter of a century later, and a Reddit thread entirely designed to celebrate the rib-breaking hyper-sexualized fighter pilot’s mere existence has seen plenty of commenters come out of the woodwork to state their utmost admiration for one of the most ludicrous – but still deliriously entertaining – opponents Bond has… well, come across.

It’s reasonable to expect that we’ll never see anyone like Xenia Onatopp in the franchise again, so her legacy will no doubt last forever.