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Savior of cinema Taylor Swift doing her civic duty by dragging the global box office by the scruff of the neck up to her level

Records are about to be shattered into a million tiny little pieces.

NEWARK, NEW JERSEY - SEPTEMBER 12: Taylor Swift attends the 2023 MTV Video Music Awards at the Prudential Center on September 12, 2023 in Newark, New Jersey.
Photo by Jamie McCarthy/WireImage

Not content with deciding that she’d have to roll her sleeves up and single-handedly drag the domestic box office up to her level, Taylor Swift has now made it official that she’s planning on conquering the entire world.

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The Eras Tour concert movie has already caused half a dozen competitors to flee in the face of Swifties taking over cinemas everywhere, which is completely understandable when even the most pessimistic of early projections have the hotly-hyped release opening to at least $100 million through its first three days in multiplexes.

And yet, we can toss any and all existing records for the concert genre right out of the window, set them on fire, and then stomp on their smoldering ashes, because The Eras Tour has now been confirmed to be opening in over 100 countries worldwide on Oct. 13. As you can imagine, Barbenheimer levels of fever pitch have instantly swept across the planet, and you’d best try and secure your tickets for opening night as early as humanly possible.

It’s ironic that a non-fiction feature with Swift front and center is poised to hoover up an insane amount of money from cinemas, considering that whenever she pops up in the fictional arena the results tend to be painfully dire. Not to mention any The Giver, Cats, or Amsterdam in particular, but it’ll be refreshing for the singer and occasional actress to show up in something that isn’t a steaming pile of garbage that tanks for a change.

Good for her, we say, and the box office is in for a massive boost during its typically leaner fall months, too.